dropdeadesu:

A friend of mine just messaged me saying “I fucked up. I was doing math with my son, and I told him to ‘hold up eleven fingers’ and he started to panic and I didn’t realize why until he screamed ‘MOM…MOM I ONLY HAVE TEN”

(via memoirsofaninja)

y2kid:

i will do a lot of things but admitting im cold to my mum who told me to bring a jacket isn’t one of them

(via bastille)

bace-jeleren:

catsandcunts:

YOUR BODY IS BEAUTIFUL IF:

  • you have a body
  • that’s it
  • you’re beautiful
  • you win
  • congratulations 

You have potentially offended hundreds if not thousands of ghosts.

(Source: rl-y, via crystallized-teardrops)

oomshi:

dongboarding:

oomshi:

eat my ass

My mom said I had to eat my vegetables first

I respect that

(via bastille)

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classy-lovely